1. |
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From the first day, I knew I had to spoil you rotten
Had to play a long game, had to see it through
In retrospect you never left me that many options
One look across the table and I knew I had something to prove
I am on a bus and it's headed in a good direction
I am on a bus and it's headed where I'd like it to go
I am not behind the wheel but I'm the one calling the shots here
I am in complete control, I am in complete control
In a failed state, how are you supposed to know me?
Poison in the wires, awful air, mortal hum, better stay inside
Give you my orchard, give you the honeydew earth that I care for
You can thank me later honey I got a couple dozen things in mind
The weight of this ambition is a burden I carry
With a smile: on my throne, walk the grounds, keep relaxed, keep you in my eyes
But you are the most beautiful thing in this house and that honestly scares me
Friction tells me what to do, friction keeps me uptight
Lover's in the corner he's trying to attract my attention
And I got him dressing up, dressing up, in his ribbons and bows
The spirit is asleep but the body has got to move forward
D'ya see it now?
I am in complete control, I am in complete control, I am in complete control
Control control control control control control
Oh, I heard no lust when you were laughing there
You know that gets me down
I heard no lust, it was the just-because
That kept me hanging around
He said, please, I see no way forward
I said, all for the best
He said, please, I see no way forward
I said start making sense
'Cause I was content!
I was content!
I was content for days to tie you down
I was content!
I am on a bus in a good direction
I am in complete control!
Control control control control control control
It always feels brand
New when I see you
It's like the first time
All escalation
Deer in my headlights
We're under pressure
We're on the rise
Every color on you
Better in my eyes
I, I had ideas
We're supposed to smear
Together! but we were never enough
Ran out of parts of us
And we were so so close
My plan was watertight
I had the here and now
But I ran out of time
I hate you so much
When you are not here
I make myself sick
Drop me a line, dear
All is forgiven
If I could try this again
There's nothing left of me, man
It always feels brand
New when I see you
It's like the first time
All escalation
Deer in my headlights
I am in my prime
I cannot outrun
I cannot turn back
We are the only one
We are the only one
We are the only one
We are the only one
And I am on a bus in a good direction
The only one, only one, only one
We are the only one
We are the only one
We are the only one
We are the only one
And I am on a bus in a good direction
The only one, only one, only one
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2. |
Ssissssy
02:23
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Charlie with your broad shoulders
Charlie with your strong jawline
You're begging for the spirits, man
Why should you deserve their time
All your affirmations strike me straining and contrite
Oh, charlie, faggots only know
And who're you calling "sissy," hon?
America requires no help
Honest, for a stud like you
I thought it'd be an easy sell
There are pinpricks in the now where spirits still and take repose:
Silent 'till you're very close
Charlie, faggots only know
Ya scared?
You oughta try and loosen up, you know
Ya scared?
You oughta try and loosen up, you know
Ya scared?
It might get into you, out of you, under you,
Under you, under you, tip over, spill out
Ya scared?
You oughta try and loosen up, you know
Just watch the undertow
|
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3. |
Augury
04:37
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You will do so much harm in a week
To yourself and likely to somebody else
Even if you say that you love it
You will come to terms with
How little your intentions really count
Even on a good day you can be so destructive
Yes! yes! yes!
You will destroy your reputation
A kind of pull you didn't know you had
And when you feel the tide coming in
You will make excuses to anyone who will listen
Save yourself for last
Or worse: you will get tired of him
Hold the line, don't get seen
Don't think about what should've happened, just proceed
Now send the text and block the number, make it clean
You will do so much harm in a week
A week will stretch itself into a year
See it all coming from a mile off
Now and then a waxy night will
Make your circumscriptions crystal clear
But even on a good day
D'you think you got the guts to make the effort to stop? well...
Yes! yes! yes!
Think of things that would send you under
Think of things that would claw out your eyes
Don't even try
Hold the line, don't get seen
Do your best to worry over trivialities
And when you relapse shake it off like just another awful dream
Fail!
Fail every time from greater heights
Even fail when you succeed
I know exactly how this is gonna go
In many ways, this has already run its course
I read the entrails twenty times or more
I count a flock of carrion birds offshore
I used to dream about a man in the crook of my shoulder
But lately that does not click in
I'm standing up frozen in the middle of the night
Wearing the clothes that I bought for him, for him
Well, it - it sounds ridiculous I'm sick of it myself
But where else am I to be done?
The only thing that sticks in my head a month on
Is the chemical sweet of his nicotine gum
You feel it long before you know it: corrosive:
It's already too late to comply
You think back to how the last time you fucked
He looked a bit too far past your eyes your eyes
It hasn't even happened but that doesn't matter
Time is a blur in all directions now
You say let's figure something out but nothin ever figures out
Because tomorrow's ringing far too loud
So you just say:
Yes! Yes! Yes!
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4. |
Eager
03:16
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Don't even try to understand
What just happened
You'll likely find
It's all reaction
No point to waste my time and waste your thoughts
On why you want
Uh, what you want
Say I can't help but do what he tells me
I c-c-c-can't help but follow along
Don't wanna know why
That's the difficult part
Cause when you're desperate you work with what's available
You take shortcuts
You get wound up
I get it
Eager little thing
With the hooks and the weights and the hammers
Hello
Fear the image ain't gonna leave you
Fear gets you hot and overexposed
Eager little thing
With the locks and the leather contraptions
Hello
You think it's gonna feel like it used to
Back when you felt it in your bones
(as above, not quite below)
Is it really such a awful thing
To disappear completely
One could make the case
It's easy
Besides, better that than show your hand
By getting caught
In secret plans
Or second thoughts
The trick is
You gotta be a machine for distraction
You're not here, you're all in
A detachment
So let it be weird
No questions no answers
Where does your mind goes when you're stuck in place?
Hear pretty words
See paper cranes
Disintegrate
Disintegrate
Disintegrate
Eager little thing
With the hooks and the weights and the hammers
Hello
Fear the image ain't gonna leave you
Fear gets you hot and overexposed
Eager little thing
With the locks and the leather contraptions
Hello
You think it's gonna feel like it used to
Back when you felt it in your bones
(as above, not quite below)
Eager little thing
You will learn to be a natural
Hello
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5. |
Not-a-Person
01:55
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Are you becoming more yourself,
Or were you shipped in overnight
From somewhere else, and even so
How do you think that you could tell?
Oh, enough of your whinging!
If it looks gentle then it surely cannot hurt you
That's what they say, anyway!
A figure lily white and frozen shut
Will stick its grubby fingers full of flowers
Through my purview
And call it virtue!
A politic of pastel temper
Hothead gets you unremembered
A helpless posture, over-watered,
Mark the out-of-towners
Like the cowards that they are
Stick it!
Image authentic and
Striking in profile
A fan fiction string section
That twink shit skinny smile
A delicate profundity
What channel channels real desire
A quaver in the voice
A shibboleth you only preach to choirs
Over-individuated
Nuclear un-detonation
Empty guts of styrofoam
You one by one expire:
Take your tight little ass
Take your halcyon daze
Take your narrative shtick
Take your lexical shame
Now take one big house with all your friends
Your only path to future days
An orchestra behind you
And a comely hunk to guide you on your way
You wanna call me by your -
Fleshy mass on gray stone legs
Long overripe
Sickly and fragile
About to tip over
Oblong shape with no name
Not-a-person waiting for the crush
Moving too quickly
An image you catch in a window
Across the street at midday
A pattern you see in the kitchen tile
Then it's gone
The body has moved on
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6. |
Hecatomb
08:21
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By the time we realized that something was off
It was already late in the day and no one could reach you
We pooled information, picked apart messages
Cross-referenced with satellite imagery
Man we read you like fiction
I held it together couple hours
Till the authorities asked for a physical description and then...
Pull a loose end through the friends of your friends of our friends
Thread this needle through the now
What favors you calling in?
Where is the nearest bridge?
What are the distances?
You can think but don't say any of it aloud
It's hard to do this stuff remote
And stay calm when it's quiet out
I've been laughing off in crowded rooms with anyone
Under a foot of snow a couple hours away
I've been up at beaver lake, lying in a sea of sun
I've been afraid
I did not press questions I do not know how it really went down
Maybe you were headstrong all the way
Maybe they grabbed you a minute or less before you woulda otherwise left the ground
Maybe it took a certain change of frame
Oh it was all there in abstraction
But you had to walk it back after it stared you in the face
Or maybe it was somewhat more mundane
I bet you never had the chance to get that far
It's just a momentary lapse
Drunk in your bedroom, phone long dead and way too sick of yourself to get the door
Maybe we lost our minds for a false alarm
What a waste!
But who has the guts to run those numbers anymore?
I've been laughing off in crowded rooms with anyone
Under a foot of snow a couple hours away
I've been up at beaver lake, yeah, lying in a sea of sun
In the pictures I've been trying to hide my face
Crane my neck to catch a breeze from past the riverbank
On René-Lévesque, out watching the parade
I've been trying to forget I came from anywhere, oh
I've been afraid of you, my friend, I've been afraid
But sometimes!
The light will hit with a particular dread
And it clears me out!
The word is "instead"
The word is "instead"
And I'm just thinking:
If one more well-wisher tells me I look put-together
I'm gonna lose my head
D'you understand what that would mean?
I see these kids with undercuts walking hand in hand
And I feel so goddamn old, man
Completely obsolete
A special case, a cosmic mistake, the one that gets away
And you are passing through the edges,
Passing through the edges of things
No, we are surely are one and the same
Do you think we're poisoned at the root?
Survivor of the hecatomb
Do you think we're poisoned at the root?
Survivor of the hecatomb
It only takes a trick of light, an awful thought, a missed reply, one dumb mistake with someone in the room
And it always could be over soon
Over soon, over soon
Do you think we're poisoned at the root?
Survivor of the hecatomb
Do you think we're poisoned at the root?
Survivor of the hecatomb
It only takes a trick of light, an awful thought, a missed reply, one dumb mistake with someone in the room
And it always could be over soon
Over soon, over soon, over soon
Like hacking off a limb before the rot sets in?
I've been laughing off in crowded rooms with anyone
Under a foot of snow a couple hours away
I've been up at beaver lake, yeah, lying in a sea of sun
In the pictures I've been trying to hide my face
Crane my neck to catch a breeze from past the riverbank
On René-Lévesque, out watching the parade
I've been trying to forget I came from anywhere, oh
I've been afraid
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7. |
||||
In this community
Things are going altogether well
In this community
Things are going altogether well
In this community, in this community, in this community
Things are going things are going altogether well
No jerks allowed
A quiet place
No one rejected
No one turned away
The ritual
The welcome home
The kind of thing
You get it or you don't
So watch your tone
Normal denied
I sympathize
It will be re-supplied
It's common sense
It's common thought
So just be kind
It wavers then it locks
I smell an eggshell
Learns how to walk and
Talks pretty soft but
Moves like a cop, yeah?
Aesthetic pleasure
I aim for half-way
Targets and measures
If you could spend your day
Anywhere else, man
Would you be here? why
Would you be here?
If you could spend your day
Anywhere else, well
Would you be here? why
Would you be here?
Would you be here?
In this community
Where things are going altogether well
In this community
Where things are going altogether well
In this community, in this c-c-c-c-c-community, in this community
Where things are going things are going things are going...
No jerks allowed
A quiet place
No one rejected
No one turned away
The ritual
The welcome home
The kind of thing
You get it or you don't
So watch your tone
Normal denied
I sympathize
It will be re-supplied
It's common sense
It's common thought
So just be kind
It wavers then it locks
I smell an eggshell
Learns how to walk and
Talks pretty soft but
Moves like a cop, yeah?
Aesthetic pleasure
I aim for half-way
Targets and measures
If you could spend your day
Anywhere else, man
Would you be here? why
Would you be here?
If you could spend your day
Anywhere else, well
Would you be here? why
Would you be here?
Would you be here?
Sooner than you understand
You will struggle to recall a
Point in time before you were
Dying to know me
You're dying to know me
I need you to like me, man
I'll do everything right
I am quick on the uptake
I am good conversation, I swear
I will be worth your time
I know it looks desperate, man
I'll stay as long as I'm allowed
I don't know what you've heard but I'm a decent investment
I swear - I will not weigh you down
If no one cares where you end up
You'd better make yourself desired
If you want a shoulder to cry on then
You'd best bes playing for the team
If you got nowhere else to sleep tonight
And best-laid plans backfire, god forbid
And the thought of going home rips your soul out your chest
(and in your case, let's say that it should)
You better make sure that you're part of the scene
If you want anybody out there to care that you're breathing
Tomorrow, you better look radiant
Better be fuckable, better stay mean
'cha waitin for?
'cha waitin for?
D'you call it a family?
Here now here now here now
Well, if you could spend your day
Anywhere else, here, now, now, bleagh
Well, if you could spend your day
Anywhere else, Huh? Huh? Here, now
Well, if you could spend your day
Anywhere else, then,
Would you be here?
Would you be here?
Starving animals will eat
Each other first,
Each other first,
Each other first,
Each other first
|
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8. |
The Cage
01:38
|
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a leopard went around his cage from one side back to the other side
he stopped only when the keeper came around with meat
a boy who had been there three hours began to wonder
is life anything like that
|
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9. |
Horrific & You
03:13
|
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Think you're getting off that easy?
Doomers beeline straight to civil war
A numerology
To frame the existential dread
Comfort of a real pathetic sort, you know?
Buddy if you're lonely
Semiotic feedback
Patterns in the headlines
Will show you where to go
Won't help you, though.
Love is never gonna save you
If love is just whatever makes you feel at home
So don't
Try to keep this short
This should all be hard
It needs to be horrific
Otherwise what's it worth?
A promise with no plan
An animal defanged
Your teenage-sweetheart whisper:
Dead before it lands
Your gods and numbers strike me wretched
Unitary creatures scattered wide
Anthropomorphized
Justice only by default
One and all attendants of a cruel divine
So! tell you what I see, man:
Somewhere in the guts, yeah
Filaments contort and stretch
World becomes an architect
And terrors lie awake
So whatcha say?
An eye that serves a mind without a face
Limbs that move like continental plates
Can't wait
So don't
Try to keep this short
This should all be hard
It needs to be horrific
Otherwise what's it worth?
A promise with no plan
An animal defanged
Your teenage-sweetheart whisper:
Dead before it lands
Up at 4 am
Trying to catch a glimpse
A haunt that shows you nothing
Or something you already have
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10. |
||||
You should not call me handsome, man
'Cause I don't know what to do with that
I think it's best you shut your mouth, honey
While I'm trying to give you head
How would you put to words the future you're dreaming of
As you drift to sleep with someone you don't trust that much
Would you start with the weight of the body,
Heat of the morning, the new sensations
Or the little headaches, the seeing stars
Who pays the bills, the old incantations:
Someday Tom of Finland
Someday Sufjan Stevens
Someday fat and sugar
Why should I keep secrets?
Someday recreation
Someday be realistic
Someday we'll get good news
Someday I'm giving in
If I roll over awful on a crying afternoon
With an icon of these wasted days confused beside me
What I'm scared of: will I wake up one day to resent you?
I mean, humor me, not to worry, we can work it through
Together right now going line by line, see:
Someday Tom of Finland
Someday Sufjan Stevens
Someday out there no strings
Other days we sleep in
Someday a nice apartment
Someday full-time live-in
Someday we'll get good news
Someday I'm giving in
It ain't a crisis yet
Just an overload, y'know
It's a temporary hold-up
Get your ass back on the road
Monomaniacal
Uh, a dark cloud
Unfettered hedonic capital
Dreamboat cerberus
Reach out!
Muscle and sinew treadmill overboard
It's all neurochemical
Uh, a dark cloud
Get that A/B/O shit
Permafrost symbiote
Love like the death drive
Without bound!
"Desire hath no rest"
Hath no desire, now:
What's on your mind, hon?
Uh, a dark cloud
Ego death for young men:
New machines, no intent
Reasonable neighborhood
In a nice town but
Overstimulation got my
Nerves desensitized
Every night back in your arms:
A dark cloud
Ego death for young men:
With you I'm somewhere else
I can't play it off and
I cannot pay attention, I'm gone,
I'm way a-head!
I'm trying to explain it but
You've really got to see it for yourself
Yeah, really got to see it for yourself
Put me back
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11. |
Lysis
02:41
|
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In palm springs where the snowbirds sleep,
Tech-fattened retirees
Spend golden years on Grindr
Sending racy messages to me
Lately they swear they're hearing microwaves,
An extra lisp inside their brain
But hon, it's just a background process.
No one's playing games
There's holes in every homo's brain-pan
Where the ego comes undone
Now at last they're turning open,
Now they melt and start to run
Ain't no gunner on the balcony,
Ain't no one listening in
Yeah, that mutter in your skull
Existed long before you did
I send out message after message
And pray for no reply
A selfish thought:
Forget me not, but only in the corner of your mind
The coward's plea:
I'll come for you if you comfort me
And you're wasting in the shallows
While you pine for open sea
So why d'you hesitate for somewhere
You've already made your home?
Why act scared and sentimental,
Cling to feeble flesh and bone
Well, I have no such reservations
I was always good to go
It's just like I've been saying, angel:
Faggots only know
|
Water Gun Water Gun Sky Attack Montreal, Québec
music from far away, laterally, and far down, diagonally
booking / inquiries / commissions / complaints / talk to me: wgwgsa.music at gmail
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